A dose of fetish. Good friends. An incomparable muse.
Welcome to Saturday Spotlight, where I choose what I consider a standout piece from my Sunday Writing Prompt.
Last week’s prompt was, “The Little Things”, https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2021/07/11/sunday-writing-prompt-july-11-21-the-little-things/
My choice for this week brought a tear to my eye. It was authentic and heartfelt, bringing me back to my own struggles with depression. I FELT every word scribed, which is why Bree stood out to me in a multitude of ways. She wrote with courage (regardless whether it was fact or fiction), something I wish I’d had the strength to do when I was at a low. Granted, I wrote, but I didn’t share it with anyone.
Enjoy and ABSORB Bree’s submission, “It’s The Little Things”, https://saidbree.wordpress.com/2021/07/12/its-the-little-things/
Loneliness. Guilt. Rejection. Pain. These are the words that repeat themselves over and over, never silent, always in my thoughts. Lonely, although I am not really alone. Guilty, although I’ve done nothing wrong. Rejected, although I’m still afraid to even put myself out there. Pain, because I have nothing left to fight for, and no one fighting for me.
I’ve spent my whole life living for other people, not because they asked me to, but because I felt that I should. I’ve never just done what I truly wanted, never put myself before all others, never strayed too far from the life that I knew, from the people that I loved. And now, here I am, ashamed of the person I have become, resenting everyone for not loving me the way that I love them, but still trying to reach out in the only ways I know how. It’s small things… a shared video clip, a question that I already know the answer to, a request to watch TV or to play a game. Sometimes I make up a reason to conversate… Did they know this? How do you do that. Mostly met with barely contained annoyance. I feel silly for trying so I crawl back into my cave with my tail between my legs, feeling (yet again) unloved and unwanted. A nuisance. And so I cry. And cry some more, until I can’t breathe and my chest hurts and I just want it all to end. But it never does. Because I am too afraid. Will it hurt? Will it even work? Would anyone notice or would it take the internet going out for someone to come in and reset the router.
It wouldn’t take a miracle to save me. I often think it might not take much at all. A smile. A hug. A phone call. It truly is the little things that could make all the difference in someone’s life.
Please, take a moment to visit Bree’s site, and give the kudos she deserves, https://saidbree.wordpress.com/
And tune in for tomorrow’s Sunday Writing Prompt, where SILENCE is the name of the game 🙂